49 Days Journal Challenge – Day 2

Sragen, 26.05.2020.

18.33. I’m not listening to any music right now. I’m at my grandmother’s house, preparing for a sleepover–or a series of sleepovers, you might say. Things are a bit complicated with Grandma’s situation, so I can’t explain much, but she has been asking me to stay the night whenever I’m in the hometown. I’d been saying no because of Ramadhan and college (I prefer to eat sahur with my parents and siblings, and college is easier to handle when I’m at my own home), but now that I’m in the final exam season and Ramadhan is over, I say ‘yes’ to the sleepovers.

When I’m writing this, Grandma is asleep in the bed next to me. I actually plan to watch an episode or two of When The Weather is Fine (a cozy and chill Korean drama I’ve been watching) before writing this entry, but seeing that the internet connection here is unstable, I decided to do this first.

I took my pills earlier today. This morning I had an appointment with my psychiatrist and she gave me a new pill to try on. I left the pill at home and since I don’t remember the name, I can’t tell you right now. The psychiatrist told me that in a month, if my insomnia has decreased (is this the right term?), I could go back to my old sets of pills (Nopres, Depakote, and Lorazepam). Sometimes I’m not sure whether the pills are actually working or not. All I know is that it’s been easier to wake up in the morning and my breakdowns have never been as severe as they used to be before November last year. So I guess that’s a good thing? This past week I’ve been having insomnia, which was why the psychiatrist got me a new addition of medicine.

Today was the presentation of my final project in Sistem Pemberkasan (Archiving System? I don’t know what’s it called in English). To be honest, I did terrible. I regretted that I didn’t prepare as much as I should have been, but at least it was over now. There are still three final projects left from other classes and if all goes well, by the end of next week, I would be saying goodbye to this semester. My third year in college, nearing its end! I’m so thrilled. The nearest deadline is on Thursday. While I’m anxious because I’m not sure I’ve done enough research on the subject, I am strangely excited to work on it. I guess I do have a thing for written assignments.

It was raining again this afternoon. I like it when the weather is cloudy and breezy. Even though I get cold easily, I love the fact that I have reason to cuddle up in my blanket or wearing my favourite jacket during weather like this. I have to admit that it’s weird though. We’re in May and it still rains every day. Sometimes I fear that the seasons will keep shifting and one day I will find myself on a scorchingly dry day in January. I think I’m gonna hate it. January is my birth month and I prefer it to be raining every day.

I guess it’s enough talk for today.

Be brave. Be happy. Good night.

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